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i have become mentally strained the past few weeks but these past few days have been especially difficult for me...in a weird kind of way. i run around all the time i stay up late i wake up at weird times but lately i can't sleep at night when i am laying in bed because i feel like my brain can't turn off. then i spend all morning dragging and take a nap at random afternoon times and i think that is also what keeps me up at night. while i lay in bed i'm thinking about money (all the time now UGH), thinking about what i did that day, thinking about what i have to do the next day and if i have everything ready for the next day, but worst of all i think about what goes on with my clients. i love my work but i'm trying to learn how to not bring it home. i've gotten attached and tied up with the stories and situations they've shared with me and now i think about it while im laying in bed, trying to figure out what i need to do to help them, thinking about how i can be better....the list goes on and on
i have to learn how to worry about myself and my problems and try to leave theirs at the door because i am up late thinking about how they must feel and how badly i wish i could help. we talk about each client and any issues during supervision and seminar but it makes it hard sometimes because i can't talk about anything with anybody. Somehow just writing this makes me feel better and actually formulating words and sentences about how i feel so thanks for reading
hope you're having an amazing week
xo -c

happy father's day & happy first day of summer!

hello all
happy fathers day to all you papas out there
happy first day of summer as well! (: my favorite season
summer's my middle name (not as cool as danger, but it works)
sadly this is the first father's day I've spent away from my family and so
i thought writing and reflecting about them would make me feel better about it
my dad is one of my many heroes and I've written a whole blog about that
my Godfather and uncle are two men i also have learned a number of things from
but somebody that i don't write about is my grandfather
he and my grandmother moved here from Mexico in the 60's and have truly
lived the "American dream"
to this day, my grandpa will not tell me what grade he had to drop out to support his family but is the most intelligent person i know. he knows what it takes to raise a family, learn a foreign language, treat people with respect, establish a successful business, and so much more. he's also the person who taught me how to multiply with times tables he would write out, helped me learn how to rollerblade, he taught me how to dance, and has taught me that the friends you have when you're down and broke are the friends you keep when you're up and doing well in life.

i could write a book of all the things he's taught me.

his 75th birthday is coming up and he continues to inspire me as he continues to grow and learn. he is currently learning how to text message and as silly as it sounds it is so awesome to see how he has kept up with the world around him and still moves forward in life. he still works full time with his own business, still works with the church, and is commited passing his wisdom to our family. between his grace on the dance floor and handy man skills my grandfather is the renaissance man.
to the man who danced me to sleep everynight because it was the only way i would,
te quiero muchismo y te extrano tambien
-celestE



ps
happy father's day to your daddy!

wacky wednesday

hello all
lots and lots going on
work has been much more time consuming along with trying to keep up with all the paper work for my practicum is difficult
last night taco's tuesday with luke and alex was exactly what we needed (:
today i miss my family quite terribly
this is my first summer away from home ): i sound like a little kid at camp
short sweet and to the point
more later (promise)
c.

ordinary.

today I've spent a good part of my time pondering the role I play in the world
it's something I think about every now and again, especially when making decisions of how I want to spend my life and when I motivate myself to work harder
but today was different...
I thought about how hard I've worked the past few years, hustling through college and busting my bum to get where I'm at today. So now I'm here, this is what I thought I've worked for knowing it would take me to the next step. Now that I'm here, I don't know exactly how I feel about it or what that "next step" is. I've thought about how badly I want to help the community I live in (wherever that may be) and help those in need. But then there's the business driven daddy's girl within me that loves the hustle, loves to network, and loves the challenge.
Potential careers I'd love to have include:

• work in a counseling firm
  
• have my own practice
• establish a non profit organization for at-risk adolescents
  
• have my own bakery that pairs cupcakes with beer and wine
• have my own (separate) bakery that is frilly and serves cupcakes with tea
• open up a store like buffalo exchange but with baby clothes, they grow so fast!
  
• design and create my own accessories (dressing conservative for sessions gets old)
  

I will be satisfied when I fulfill 6 out of 7 of those goals, the last one I kind of do when I have free time but to be committed to it I'm sure would become a job and not a hobby.
So what do I do?
my goals are in no way related to each other and there's only so much time we have in life

I've decided I'm going to do it all, somehow someway
It will take me a while, but I can't feel this way anymore
being ordinary and being sedentary are two different things


so I'm off to try a new cupcake recipe, get some research done, and study for next week's sessions...juggling is something I do everyday

xo
c

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, small, but valuable. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void."
- Meg Ryan in You've Got Mail, favorite quote of all time

thank you

thank you thank you thank you
for all the birthday wishes, presents, and memories
i had a faaabulous birthday and haven't written since then
(sorry)
this will explain why
happy pizza friday everyone!
xo
c

update from CelesteNevarez on Vimeo.

sorry about the lighting and that buzzing noise i still cant figure out what it is